So, I Bought This Pig…

I got home late one night a couple of weeks ago to a couple of harried emails and phone messages.

“Hey Darrin, I’m in your neighborhood and I’ve got your hog. Call me back and I’ll drop it off.”

It’s on, suckas!

A couple of hours later, I had a couple of massive coolers sitting in my living room containing more than my weight in pork.

I was in heaven!

What followed was a couple of hectic weeks butchering, curing, smoking, and otherwise preparing the whole hog to guarantee that I don’t need to go to the grocery store again until at least the middle of next summer.

That’s right, I bought a whole pig!

Why Buy a Whole Hog?

After many months of researching, I decided to buy a whole (butchered) hog from a local farmer.

I did this for several reasons:

• I hate grocery shopping, and love the idea of having a chest freezer full of meat in my house so I don’t have to worry about it.
• I wanted to learn how to cook parts of animals that people in our culture have traditionally been afraid to try.
• Enterprising types have praised pigs since “everything but the oink” can be cooked up in some tasty way.
• I roast whole chickens all the time, but buying a whole cow is reeeeeeeeeally intimidating. A whole pig is a good challenge and middle ground between the two.
• I wanted to support local farmers that are raising their livestock sustainably and healthfully.

Here’s what I found in those coolers that fateful night:

• 2 loins
• 2 ribs
• 2 bellies
• 2 shoulders, with hocks and trotters attached
• 2 hams, with hocks and trotters attached
• 1 head (yeah, that’s right!)
• 1 liver
• 1 heart
• 1 set of lungs (fo realsies!)

I’ve been busy preserving what I can, and freezing the rest (hence the lack of updates recently).

But now it’s time I let you in on the epic project I am undertaking!

The Game Plan

Over the next several months, I’ll show you how I am cooking (and eating) an entire pig from snout to tail.

I’m calling it “The Whole Hog Project!”

Expect plenty of pics and videos as I document how to cook everything from the obvious (pork chops) to the exotic (pork skin).

Although I haven’t settled 100% on my plan, here’s the roadmap that I am currently settled on:

• I’ll cut up the loin into a bunch of pork chops for frying and grilling.
• I’ll make barbecued ribs from the ribs (der!).
• I’ll cure and smoke the bellies to make bacon.
• I’ll cure and smoke the hocks for adding to soups and stews.
• I’ll cure and smoke both of the hams to make city hams.
• I’ll make sausages, rillettes, and pulled pork from the picnic ham and butt.
• I’ll use the head, trotters, and tail to make headcheese.
• (But I’ll set aside the trotters to make something known as “trotter gear.”)
• I’ll use the copious amount of fat to make lard and cracklin’s.
• I’ll use the skin to make scratchings.
• I’ll make pâté from the liver.
• Not sure what I’ll do with the heart or lungs yet, but you will be the first to know!

The Whole Hog Project

While I’m usually all about minimalism when it comes to kitchen equipment and ingredients, I will be focusing on a different kind altogether for the next few months.

I will instead focus on using as much as possible of an animal for food in order to show how to reduce waste show how long one person can sustain themselves on the flesh of just one critter.

This certainly won’t be for the squeamish, who’d prefer to think that their meat magically appears in boneless and skinless versions shrink-wrapped at the butcher’s section of the supermarket.

Hold on to your seats, folks! Things are about to get interesting around here!